Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Mass Effect Journal 11: I’m a Man. A Manly Man, Man

Sweet! Back to some action. There’s the Matriarch. Other than having an implausible neck line for a dress (that’s some gravity defying on levels I couldn’t imagine), I would so cosplay her. But no time for that; we need to keep this story going.

Yea for a boss fight! About time with all of this running and talking. I read that someone believed this was the most difficult fight in the game because of the numerous waves of enemies. Can I laugh at that statement, because that has to be a joke? Numerous, as in 3 waves? Oh my. I can’t possibly hold all of them off.

*ducks behind a crate, continues shooting, bad guys die, done in under 3.*

Hmph. Gamers these days just don’t understand difficulty. Go play some Ninja Gaiden or Ghosts and Goblins. Then we’ll talk.
Story-wise, I’m really starting to get into this, even with the prolonged set-up. I’m seeing the pieces falling into place. Still not a fan of the crazy eyes (zomg Liara stop making that face at me! So creepy!), or the dune buggy controls, or the constant quest fetching, but I’m glad that the story is living up to the expectations.

Also, what’s up with bad guys always willing to talk just before they die? Not just Mass Effect where every NPC wants to tell you their life story. All villains everywhere, in any media. What happened to bros before hoes? Keep the secrets to your grave. Even if you don’t succeed, your villains-in-arms will if you keep your mouth shut. So…zip it. I know it doesn’t help me, the hero, if you stay quiet. But if I were a bad guy I would never tell the good guys where to go.

“The spire is at these coordinates, on this ridge, looking over this object, with this many guards. Hurry!”

Is it supposed to be for some form of redemption? If there is a heaven, hell, purgatory, or anything of the like (whatever your religious beliefs may be) I’m pretty sure that if you’re a bad guy, your need to purge the badness from your soul isn’t going to be enough in the 1 minute before your death. You’re still going to the bad place in the afterlife. Sorry. 1 minute does not atone for all of your evil deeds. But thanks for trying.

Another thing I love is when they say “Hurry!” But you don’t really have to hurry. You still have to finish off the last wave of enemies darting into the room. You still have to decide if this queen bug gets to live or die (I opted to play nice and let her live for the Paragon points). You still have to detox the Hot Lab and get out. And you can still fly all over the galaxy before you “really” have to move forward with the story.

Nah. I’m not going to hurry. Clearly there’s no rush, else I would have been sent right back to my ship to handle it.

Instead, I’m going to search around and finish some of these miscellaneous quests building up in my log.

Ok…how about here. Sand planet…what’s up with ME and the sandy planets that I’m landing on? Ok, Peak 15 was an ice world, but there seem to be a lot of sandy and/or rocky planets to explore. Where are the nice, lush, green ones? NOT THE CITADEL.

Fine. Fine. I’ll search the sandy pits of the universe. Yippie.

More fetch quests, of course, but at least there is some variety and having to play explorer. I like that. I miss that. An old MMO feeling that I really enjoy: going into the cubbyholes of a map that few others get to see. It’s a great way to take photos.

The Alpha Listening Post? handled. More bugs squashed. More sand in my shoes. Well sand and volcanic ash. Lost Asari Sister? Half-found, though that hideout had some nice loot. Well worth the 3 minutes of spinning in circles and killing off the thugs with my dune buggy (Forget shooting. Run them over!!) Still have sand in my shoes.

All-in-all a productive gaming session with lots of dead bugs, geth, and a handful of Asari. Sorry Liara. Your mom’s fault. She made me do it.


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